How might the American singer/songwriter and satirist
Tom Lehrer bring inspiration to British political leadership campaigns?
Probably not by suggesting that enthusiastic support for poisoning pigeons in
the park would be a keynote environmental vote winner. But if we were to
combine his spoken introductions to “Oedipus Rex” and “It Makes A Fellow Proud
To Be A Soldier”, we might find a clue for our theme: “…and I am convinced that
the only reason for the failure of this candidate’s leadership bid last time
around….you’re way ahead of me…is that he did not have a rousing campaign song
with which to rally his potential followers.”
Let us apply this theory to – you’re way ahead of me –
the case of a well known current aspirant to the Conservative leadership, and
borrow a song from another famous singer by the name of Tom. “The Young New
Mexican Puppeteer” was a hit for Tom Jones in 1972, reaching number 6 in the UK
charts. A few lyrical amendments may go down well with Boris supporters, and of
course badly with Boris haters…
In the Palace of Westminster
Worked a most concerned MP
He said lately I have noticed
The PM hardly speaks for me
She spreads the gloom from her advisers
“The UK can’t survive alone”
He said “I’ll lift the people’s spirits
With Brexit vision of my own”
The blond Conservative Brexiteer
He saw the people all live in fear
He thought that maybe they’d listen to
Boris telling them what to do
So he got to grips with Remain falsehood
He made some speeches and he was good
And folks came running so they could hear
The blond Conservative Brexiteer
First he quit the Foreign Office
“The Chequers Plan’s a steaming turd”
Then he echoed Winston Churchill
“Take back control, embrace the world”
Determined as the Iron Lady
Convinced the battle would be won
He knew he’d smile with satisfaction
When Theresa May was gone
[Chorus]
Now his speaking skills were clever
And he gave the people hope
When he got across the message
To make the most of Brexit’s scope
They voted for him in their millions
And he smashed Corbyn and the Reds
And then they wrote him up in all the papers
And this is what the story said
[Chorus]
