Thursday 17 September 2020

They Swallowed The Lie: Another Song for Covid-19

 

If we were to cast our minds back 50 years or more, we might recall a joke song of a slightly scary nature – as it seemed at the time to the average infant – about the curious gastronomic pursuits of an old lady, whose inevitable consequential demise was confirmed in spoken word form right at the end. Stand up and take a bow, Burl Ives - video link below.

On the subject of demise, a fate that awaits us all some day, one of Lord Sumption’s observations on the government reaction to Covid is that we have been made to feel an irrational horror of death. Could it be that a lethal combination of charlatan experts and arse covering politicians, neither having properly considered whether lockdown might cause greater misfortunes of a different nature, has induced us to swallow a lie?

Back to that scary song. Pick up the guitar, strum an opening C chord, and reappraise the lyrics: -   


I know a whole nation who swallowed a lie

We all know why they swallowed the lie

They feared they’d die

 

I know a whole nation who furloughed the labour

And left a huge bill for the taxpaying neighbour

They furloughed the labour to back up the lie                             

We all know why they swallowed the lie                                     

They feared they’d die                                                  

 

I know a whole nation who shut all the works

What absolute berks to shut all the works

 

They shut all the works ‘cause they’d furloughed the labour

And left a huge bill for the taxpaying neighbour

They furloughed the labour to back up the lie

We all know why they swallowed the lie

They feared they’d die

 

I know a whole nation shut hospital wards

How could they afford to shut hospital wards

 

They shut all the wards to save the works (etc)

 

I know a whole nation who shut all the schools

Such impetuous fools to shut all the schools

 

They shut all the schools to save the wards (etc)

 

I know a whole nation who shut all the pubs

A gratuitous snub when they shut all the pubs

 

They shut all the pubs to save the schools (etc)

 

I know a whole nation with mandatory muzzles

A curious puzzle, inflicting the muzzles

 

They inflicted the muzzles to save the pubs

They shut all the pubs to save the schools

They shut all the schools to save the wards

They shut all the wards to save the works

They shut all the works ‘cause they’d furloughed the labour

And left a huge bill for the taxpaying neighbour

They furloughed the labour to back up the lie

We all know why they swallowed the lie

They feared they’d die

 

I know a whole nation who took a big knife

To their quality of life



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